Evidence in Divorce and Custody Cases

2024/09/18

“It didn’t happen if there isn’t a document to prove it.” This proposition is a little bit like “possession is nine tenths of the law.” It sounds good and frequently applies, but it isn’t as absolute as it sounds. In any divorce and custody case, the testimony of the parties is paramount. Yes, the court may hear from experts in financial cases or a party’s parents or best friend in a custody case who says the party is a wonderful parent. But, in my experience, judges want to hear from the parties to assess their credibility and to get to the central issues in any given case. In divorce cases, the court is required to consider a list of factors for property distribution and a list of separate but similar factors in alimony cases. These factors generally cover “equitable” considerations—meaning what is fair. After all, the court is charged with pursuing “economic justice” in each case. These general concepts include: Each party’s age, health, and ability to work. Contributions to the marriage, both financial and non-financial evidence, such as caring for children. Financial circumstances of each party, especially sources of current and future income. Support by one party of the other party’s education, career or earning capacity. Property brought into the marriage by one party from sources such as inheritances. The standard of living developed during the marriage. Documents such as statements for financial accounts, credit card statements, tax returns, and other financial records will be key; in alimony cases, the budget of the party seeking alimony is also critical. But it is often the testimony of the parties—the story of the marriage—that will drive a court’s analysis of a fair, equitable financial resolution to a case. This applies with even more force in custody cases. Again, the court is charged with applying a set of statutory factors to the facts of the matter. Read More

Understanding Interim Financial Relief

2024/09/06

When parties separate in anticipation of divorce, there are several key financial considerations that must be addressed at the outset. Who’s staying in the residence? Who’s paying support to whom, what, if anything, do we do with the marital assets and debts while the case is pending? Interim relief is not the final, disposition of assets; think of it as a band aid until the case can be concluded, or the parties and the Court can get their arms around what’s involved. An initial consideration is who stays in the residence, or exclusive occupancy of the house. Note: this discussion does not address parties involuntarily removed from a home due to the filing of a petition for protection from abuse. If the parties agree, typically, one party notifies the other that they intend to move. In a perfect world, the parties address how the household expenses will be paid, and there is no need for court or legal intervention. If the parties cannot agree on who vacates, then one or both parties will file a Petition for Exclusive Occupancy of the residence. This relief is only available if a Divorce Complaint is filed, because the Court does not have jurisdiction over the home in the absence of a Complaint. Parties might seek exclusive occupancy when the discord in the residence is too high and could escalate. One or both parties may be unnecessarily intrusive on the other’s peace and quiet in the home. A party might be intercepting the other’s mail or monitoring phones or other devices. Often the deciding factor whether to direct that a party vacate is where there is a negative impact on children. The Court will schedule a hearing on the issue of exclusive occupancy, and it will evaluate why parties seek this interim relief. The Court will hear testimony from the parties, and possibly interview the children. Read More

Top 5 Divorce and Custody Myths

2024/06/19

Whether it is from TV shows, movies, or stories from friends, people who are unacquainted with the divorce and custody process often come to initial consultations with attorneys with certain expectations that are, well, based on myths. Here are the most common myths that have made the top five list: I didn’t work during the marriage so I will receive lifetime alimony: Alimony is available in Pennsylvania, but it is what is known as a “secondary remedy”—secondary to asset distribution. This means that the court attempts to fix financial disparities with assets first—potentially by “skewing” the distribution percentage (giving one party more than 50% of the estate)—which leads to the next myth. Assets are always divided 50/50: Pennsylvania is an equitable distribution state, not an equal distribution state. That means that courts will look at several factors to determine what is fair in an effort to promote “economic justice.” Those factors include contributions to the marriage (economic and non-economic), the relative financial status of the parties, sources of current and future income, and other similar considerations. It may well be that a 50/50 division of assets is fair; but the court can award one party a higher percentage of the estate if the circumstances warrant. The party filing for divorce pays the other person’s fees: Typically, each party pays for their own legal fees. There are several exceptions to this general rule, such as when one party acts in bad faith or there is an extreme disparity in financial circumstances. But those exceptions are somewhat rare. I had an affair so I deserve less/ my spouse had an affair so I deserve more: Although the reasons why the marriage ended are a factor in an alimony case, the “moral” issues leading to divorce increasingly do not move the needle one way or the other. Read More

We’re Divorce Lawyers. These Are The 6 Qualities We Look For In A Romantic Partner.

2024/05/29

Carla Schiff Donnelly was recently featured in “We’re Divorce Lawyers. These Are The 6 Qualities We look For In A Romantic Partner.” which was published in Huff Post, on March 29, 2024. Read More

A House Divided-Who Keeps the House in a Divorce?

2024/05/07

When you hear a couple is divorcing, one of the first questions people ask is “who is keeping the house?” Clients rarely ask the question that way. They more often ask, should I keep the house? Indeed, that is the better question because keeping the house is not always a good thing. Couples hardly ever fight about who gets to stay in the house. During the Separation In Pennsylvania, the party that stays in the house during the separation is responsible for paying the mortgage, taxes, and insurance.  They would also have to pay the utilities and basic upkeep. There can be what’s called a “mortgage deviation” in certain circumstances.  The deviation is a small “bump” in the interim support to assist the party paying the mortgage.  Depending on the amount of the mortgage, a party can be left house poor if they remain in the home. If the party in the residence is the higher income earner, they must consider the amount of support they are paying to their spouse. If your home has a relatively low mortgage, it may make sense to stay if it is less expensive than renting. Consider whether there are children and need to stay in the school district. If neither of you can afford the house without the contribution from the other party’s income, consider placing the house on the market for sale.  You can both live in the home until it sells provided this can be done safely and in a manner not detrimental to the children. After the Divorce After equitable distribution (division of property), it is important to keep in mind that the mortgage deviation goes away and the amount of support you are receiving or paying likely will reduce. If you are the dependent spouse, depending on your ability to earn, the cost of the upkeep of the home and the amount of guaranteed support, if may make sense to downsize.  Read More

This Divorce Trend Is Becoming More Popular With Celebs – For A Good Reason

2024/03/21

Carla Schiff Donnelly authored “This Divorce Trend Is Becoming More Popular With Celebs – For A Good Reason,” which was published in Huff Post, on March 21, 2024. Read More

5 Tips for Better Co-parent Communications

2024/03/12

As a child of divorce, I know there is nothing more heartwarming than when your parents can get along and co-parent well. No, you do not need to be besties with your ex. However, you owe it to your children to strive toward more cordial and respectful communications. Here are some tips: Use “please” and “thank you” It may sound silly, but using these simple words is a great start toward more respectful communication. Once I have clients start using these words in all of their communications, they often improve their overall communication style. Clients often tell me that their ex writes terrible emails or texts. That is not an excuse to write terrible messages back. Rather, it is an opportunity to lead by example. Do not lecture or brow beat You should communicate with your ex to gather and convey information, not to teach lessons. Be real, when was the last time your ex took one of your lectures to heart? Instead of “How many times do I need to remind you not to pack junk food in Billy’s lunch,” try “At the store, Billy picked out some low-fat yogurt cups and trail mix to bring with his lunch. It is such a relief that he found a healthy snack he likes. Let me know if you have any other ideas.” Read your old messages When you want to improve communication, a good place to start is to review your old messages. Ask yourself, are you proud of what you wrote? Was the tone, appropriate?  Would you be proud if your children found a copy of them when they get older? If your answer was not “yes” to these three questions, think about how you can improve your communication. Take your emotion out of it Treat communication with your ex like a business transaction. Read More

Will Your Valentine’s Day Engagement Mean a Prenup in Your Future?

2024/02/16

For divorce lawyers, Valentine’s Day means two things: engagements and prenuptial agreements.  While others are throwing away wilted roses and finishing off the last few chocolates from heart shaped boxes, divorce attorneys are fielding calls about prenuptial agreements. As I discussed in “Getting Married? Four Reasons Why You Need a Prenuptial Agreement,” here are four reasons you need a prenuptial agreement before you exchange your vows: You want to simplify your divorce (if you ever need one); You want to protect your business; You want to protect your home, retirement and other assets; and You want to protect your children’s inheritance in the event of your death. While I am not suggesting you ask for a prenuptial agreement on Valentine’s Day, it is never too early to start thinking about whether you need one and what you want to protect. It is no fun to be doing last minute wedding planning and negotiating a prenuptial agreement at the same time. Get it done so you can focus on the fun stuff: the wedding, honeymoon and the marriage! If you are interested in finding out whether you need a prenuptial agreement, contact us to get started. Read More

Considering Divorce? Consider Mediation

2024/01/29

Pietragallo partner Carla Schiff Donnelly was trained in mediation years ago and has participated in more than 100 mediations. Mediation is one of the best tools to resolve a family law matter. She recently took a refresher course for mediators to further hone her skills and learn more techniques to help couples navigate their family law issues. Here are  some of the advantages to mediation that Carla has learned: Lower Cost Although she recommends that both parties consult lawyers, mediation is far more economical than having the court resolve your issues. As a litigator, she knows how expensive court time can be. Just a simple status conference can cost hours of attorney time for both parties. You need to prepare for the conference, get there early, often wait because the court is running behind, and then travel back to the office. Even if the lawyers participate in the mediation, you are still saving time and money. Control the Outcome If you go to court, a stranger will be deciding where your children will live and how much money you will receive. You may win on issues you care less about and lose on what is most important to you. Better Outcomes The court will divide your money and children with the equivalent of a meat cleaver. Mediation gives you the opportunity to divide money and time with your children with the precision of a scalpel. Sometimes what works best for you and your family is not what a court will order. Confidentiality Mediation is a confidential process. Court is not confidential. Do you want your dirty laundry aired out at the courthouse? Compliance If you enter into an agreement voluntarily, you are more likely to adhere to it than you are with court-imposed resolutions. That means your ex is more likely to comply too. Read More

Is Divorce Your New Year’s Resolution?

2024/01/11

Divorce attorneys see an uptick in new client calls come January each year. Some bide their time in order to get through the holidays for the sake of the children. For others, the stress of the holidays can cause the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Many, however, see a new year as time to leave behind what makes them unhappy, be it bad habits or an unhappy (or abusive) marriage. That is where the New Year’s Resolution comes in. As a divorce lawyer for many years, I am often asked if I recommend marriage counseling to my clients. My answer is yes, if it indicated. Unfortunately, the times I have recommended marriage counseling are few and far between. That is because of all the time and contemplation that goes into making the call to a divorce attorney in the first place. By the time a client comes in to see their lawyer, they have often been unhappy for a long time and their marriage is beyond repair. Ambivalence and fear prevent people from coming to us sooner. New Year’s Resolutions can be the push they need to make the call. The “funny” thing is, once the client comes in, they often regret not coming in sooner. Their questions are answered and the process is less daunting and mysterious. As we get up from the conference room table it is not unusual to hear “I feel so much better than I did when I got here.” The Next Chapter If your resolution is to leave your marriage, contact us to set up a plan to get started. Also, you may find helpful to read about what to expect at an initial consultation. In the meantime, if you are not familiar with your finances, this may be a good time to look around for tax returns, pay stubs and other documents that may help you get a clearer picture. Read More